Mens 2s End of Season Report 2008

London League Premier Division – 6th place

http://www.londonhockeyleague.org.uk/

So what do you do when all bar three of the 2006/07 2nd XI squad leaves, no one wants to be captain, and as an ageing, widening Club Captain in a position of power, authority, good looks and intelligence, you see the opportunity to secure your 2s squad spot, for potentially a last gasp effort in your career, by making yourself captain. I could not think of an answer to that one.

As Club Captain, I thought back to happier times, and some words of advice from a previous 2s captain, Alex ‘Titch’ Jones. Titch wanted to get invited to 1st XI training, and thinking that by making himself captain, the 1st XI coach would ask him to suggest who should come to 1st XI training…

So, the 2s had a new captain, with more enthusiasm for the post than skill. Big Dave immediately spotted the weaknesses in my game… in that I have no game… just width, and plenty of that. He did not fail to exploit this as a starting point of banter all season.

Things started well for the 2s, helped particularly by the presence of several of the 1st XI stars, namely Shillen, Molely, AR, and Codders. Their class was way above anything the standard 2s squad could muster.

It was going to be a tough season to emulate last year’s auspicious 2s season; winning the Premier Division by a mile, not loosing a game, the U18s (who made up nine of the squad on a bad day) winning the national title and to all effects the European title, and still managing to host some 1s benchers as well.

The words consolidation, mid-table mediocrity, do the best we can sprang to mind from the word go.

But unknowingly, in the first seven games we had won 5 and drawn 1, loosing in a game of swamp hockey at Old Loughts 2-1. Scores were not high, winning by 2 and 3 each time. Points of interest included Molely getting two greens in the same game for the same offence. Shil scoring everything he touched. The return of Blair ‘Blairos’ Dickinson. Codders throwing his toys out the pram in every game and sticking his tongue out at an umpire at the end of the game.

The Old Georgians away game, was a game of note, a weakened squad, made up primarily of those still going through puberty went to Weybridge. A very tight first half saw us take the lead, and then have it taken away from us. At the start of the second half they came at us very strong and Big Dave pulled off a couple of Bobby Dazzlers to keep us in play. Our fitness prevailed, as did the need to get home early for X-Factor, and we walked away with it, walloping them in the second half, winning 4-1.

The team changed every week throughout the season; symptomatic of crap availability from players. In total we used 40 different players across the season, as described in the table below.

The 10 November game against Canterbury, who were top of the table, and we were second (which was not bad) was a game of the highest quality, certainly the best I have played in. Big Dave was supreme in goal, with Shillen and Molely playing a half game each. The pace of the game was phenomenal, we went 1-0 up, but were soon pegged back, and were under the cosh for most of the second half. Shil came on in the dying minutes and reverse stick shot from an impossibly acute angle take the game 2-1, and put us top of the league!

And it all went down hill from there.

A cup game at Southgate, who were ringed up to the max, against a basically 2As side saw us loose 7-0 and saw us loose our rag a few times. Draws against a strong Surbiton side and frustrating Bromley side were next.

Molely racked up two yellow cards in the same game for the same offence.

Then Indian Gym. Now what do you normally expect from an Indian Gym game… ringers, cards, goals, goals, goals… well this didn’t disappoint. Seven minutes in and they fist yellows were out, a ten minute sin bin for a Gym player for raising his fists and an unfair five for Moley for receiving the onslaught. Three more yellow cards for us, and six more for them, 3-0 up for us, and then gifting them three goals in the space of five minutes and we were 4-3 down. I got hit over the head with a stick and went down like a roll of lino, Big Dave chases over and calls there player a dirty Barsteward, the player asks Big Dave said, so Big Dave repeats himself, slightly louder, stood next to the umpire. Big Dave is requested to take a five minute breather by the Umpire and Molely goes to kicking back… I was still out cold on the floor. We lost 4-3.

H&W away, cyclonic conditions at Paddington Rec, a bare 11, with four of those borrowed from the preceding 2As game. We loose 8-1, a real low point, if only Big Dave had been there.

By this stage of the season Pete is firmly ensconced as the team whipping boy.

The new year dawns and the need to get points is ever clear. A run of three easier games yields the full nine points.

We go to EG, with a very weak team. Simon Disco Briscoe is bought in for reinforcement at the back, claiming at the start of the game that he wont venture beyond the half way line, as he is feeling tired and ill. So midway through the first half he leaps, wobbles, chunters, bobbles his way past approximately 24 tackles and finds himself in the D, he wafts the ball towards the goal, bouncing over the keeper and wring footing a useless defender, 1-0 up. EG who also had a weak squad should have gone down to ten, but the umpire could not find it in himself to send off the five year old cry baby they had playing. The same southern hemispheric umpire then proceeds to give EG a P-Flick for a wonderful deflection by Ali ‘the rat’ Parkes. They take the initiative and score another later on. Again Big Dave pulls off some blinding saves to keep us in it.

We beat OGs again at the Ghetto, though not without some moments of panic, squandering a 3-0 lead to come back to 3-3, before knicking it at the end.

The rest of the season (six games) we went without a win, seeing us tumble down the table from the top three, finally finishing sixth.

We nearly pulled it out of the bag away at Bromley, when we carved a three goal lead. Big Dave was sublime in goal, with Toby and Christian running their little student socks off up front. But with seven minutes to go, it all went wrong. Bromley scored 3 in five minutes, yes three, as our fitness went, and we made fundamental errors of judgement. Watching from the sidelines with man-flu was painful.

We lost again 4-3 to Indian Gym, who to be fair were well disciplined (only one yellow card) and one umpire on their side.

Summary is, not enough goals from our forwards, not enough fitness from our midfield and lack of experience from the defence.

Special love to Dave Tyler, who has a hard year of it with the 1s, but looked class and committed for us in the games he played in, and scored a hatful of goals to.

Special love to Molely, who always played when asked and has no pretentiousness about him. He does stand out a mile from the rest of the 2s squad.

Special love to Buggy who eventually made it back from injury post Christmas.

Special love to AR, who is an absolute dream to play with, so cool so calm, different gravy… please stay and teach us all oh Master Yoda.

Special love to Shillen, committed, quality, deserves everything he has achieved this season.

Special love to Christian and Toby, dirty tax dodging students you may be, but I love your spirit, your never say never attitude and the fact that just like Forrest Gump you keep on running.

Special love to Pete for letting us verbally and physically abuse him from the word go. We will miss you Pete.

In all, it has been a roller coaster season. Sixth place is where we ended up, safe, but not secure. One man kept us alive though, one giant man, one Very Big Dave “that’s not a great save, that’s a shit shot” Guthrie. Extra special love.

Love

Johnny Downer

2nd XI Captain